Lightening Online

That is SO not the title I thought I’d be using for this post. Not in the middle of my training session at the gym today.

Believe me, it was a KILLER!!!!

It felt like the hardest session we’ve had so far!

And that was without doing any of those evil Burpees!!!!!

We did a 2-minute circuit, alternating cardio with strength work.

I can’t believe how LONG 2 minutes can seem!!!!

Maybe I’ve finally found a way to make time slow down!!!! LOL.

What’s interesting though is the contrast between that moment when you think you’re going to die and how good you feel once you’ve finished and recovered.

During the session I was all like “I can’t wait to get home and blog (read: whinge) about this”.

Then on the drive home I’m thinking “wow, I feel kinda good”.

Just don’t tell my trainer I said so - she might get the wrong idea and think she can torture me every week!!!! LOL.

Image by cogdogblog via Flickr

I nearly didn’t go to netball training last night. I was feeling rather fragile and thought I’d be in danger of bursting into tears if things didn’t go well. Nothing serious I don’t think. Just hormones.

Anyway, I thought the exercise might help so I decided to go and take the chance.

And despite my post title, I am glad I did.

I really enjoyed it and feel like things are slowly coming back to me.

But, the most important thing is that I had fun. And lots of laughs.

And I realised something. As much as I want to improve, I need to stop taking myself quite so seriously and focus more on the “fun” part. Because getting frustrated with my lack of ability is driving me nuts!!! And sucking the fun out of the game. Wonder if I can do both (improve AND have fun)???? I hope so.

My legs are quite sore today. And I can feel the muscles in my arms as well. I’ve pulled up worse than last week! Not sure if I pushed harder this week or why they’ve done that.

Must be the week for pain from exercise I think.

My session in the gym on Monday was pretty full on. Actually, there wasn’t a lot of pain so much as complete exhaustion. You know the kind where you know you’ve given all you’ve got and there’s nothing left? That kind!

I’ve learnt something new about exercise this week. When you do stuff where you’re down low and moving to a standing position - it is EXHAUSTING!!!! AND a really GOOD workout! I’m not sure if it’s the lifting of your own body weight or what.

I’ve also learnt that burpees are my LEAST favourite exercise EVER invented!!!!

Question is, can I make this exercise my friend or will I ALWAYS hate it????

Image via WikipediIt was bound to happen eventually.

Okay, I’m not really dead.

But I’m sure I came close during my training session yesterday.

Of course, it doesn’t help that I’m a little out of shape after missing many sessions (I’ve lost count how many I’ve missed in the past couple of months with being away and sick kids etc).

And while you’re all feeling sorry for me… it actually hurts to type this post. I hope you recognise the extent of my commitment to this blog, blogging when it hurts!!!!

BUT….

I didn’t throw up (came a bit close for comfort but!).

And she did warn me at the start of the session (*wonders to herself why she didn’t run far far away at that moment…..*)

I was thinking last night that it’s a bit like childbirth.

Right in the middle of it you’re thinking “is this ever going to end?” and “I’m NEVER doing this again!!!”

Then after it’s all over you kind of think it’s all worth it (I think….).

I think I might take next week off in protest!!!!

Okay, my trainer is away next week.

But I could pretend it’s in protest.

OUCH!!!

Remind me again why I’m doing this to myself????

You’ll have to excuse me now. I’m off for a run. Okay, a jog. A nice slow one with lots of walking in between. LOL. If I can just manage to get changed….

Those push-ups were killers. It hurts to use my arms. For anything.

And I TOTALLY look like the guy in the photo above when I do push-ups!!! (shut up Fiona!) ROFLOL!!!

Image via Wikipedia That’s my nickname for the week we do “weigh and measure” with my PT. Because I usually pay for the next 6 week installment at the same time.

The first few times, I found it kind of ironic that I was paying for the “privilege” of having to get on the scales. I wasn’t really, but it was an interesting mental connection.

So today was “pay and measure” day.

And I noticed a mental connection of a different kind. It didn’t bother me the way it has in the past.

Being weighed and measured I mean.

Not sure if that’s a result of how comfortable I feel around my PT or that I’m more comfortable in my own skin. Possibly a combination of both.

Up until now I haven’t wanted to know what the figures were saying but today I really looked at them.

The Good News:

• Waist measurement is down
• Blood Pressure is down
• Weight didn’t go up despite my weight going up twice this month (I’ve been able to lose what I gained)
• Measurements reflected about what I expected. I’ve noticed when I gain weight and then lose it again that the weight is shifting - the measurements reflected what I’ve noticed in my clothing so at least I know I’m making some accurate reflections on my changing body shape.

My Current Goals:

• Stop gaining weight so that when I DO lose it, it’s an actual loss and not just a “back to where we started”.
• Exercise daily to improve fitness, get into a “habit” and help my body crave healthier foods (which it seems to do if I’m exercising daily).
• Get my waist measurements to a healthier size.
• Fit in my gold & black dress. I can actually wear it but a tiny weight loss would make it slightly more comfortable.

PT News

For those who don’t read my comments section on a regular basis, my PT has just won the highest netball award for our area (Best & Fairest A grade in the association).

And she still made it today after a big afternoon of celebrations yesterday!!! Must be built tough!

Speaking of tough, I need to go and fall into bed I think. I’m a wee bit weary. I always sleep well on a Monday night. Don’t think I’m built tough.

During my training session yesterday we did some leg work. Not a lot mind you (unless you count the running as leg work as well). What I find interesting about strength work is the way a small amount of work at the right intensity can be extremely effective.

Have you ever been in a squat and wondered if your legs were actually capable of lifting your body back to a standing position? Neither had I until yesterday.

The other thing I found fascinating during our session yesterday was how much difference a 5kg medicine ball can make. At one point my trainer took pity on me and let me do a set without the medicine ball. Who knew squats could be so easy? At least that’s how they felt in comparison to holding the extra 5kg.

Speaking of medicine balls, I haven’t used the 5kg ball before. It’s black. Which has no real significance at all other than my to set you up for my next comment.

The next size ball after the black ball is PINK!!!!

My latest gym goal?

Get strong enough to use the PINK medicine ball!!!!

Interesting that Farmboy would choose this week to need my help with some sheep work. He doesn’t ask for my help very often so I try to be obliging when he does ask. And yesterday when I got back from the gym, he asked.

Drafting sheep is generally a job for 2 people. One person to push them forward into a narrow run and another person to operate the gate that sorts the sheep into 2 different pens. Farmboy needed the lambs separated from the Ewes ready for tailing today.

Unfortunately, afternoons are a bad time for working sheep. They tend to get cranky and cantankerous (a bit like me really).

So there I am, climbing up over sheep yard railing with my jelly legs. Twas quite the challenge I can tell you!

I had another first at my training session this week. An audience!!! Our local gym is quite small (well, tiny really - I must take some photo’s sometime to show you) . Often my trainer and I are alone in the gym. A factor I quite like. But every now and then you’ll get a few others using the gym at the same time.

So I get part way through a less than flattering exercise and look up to find two pairs of eyes glued firmly on me.

Thankfully I’m a little more comfortable in my own skin than I was when we first started the training sessions. I think back then I would have freaked out and not wanted to come back.

Instead I simply made a comment to my trainer about being watched. I’m not sure my audience realised they were staring. LOL. Then one of them made some comment about how they wouldn’t be so quiet trying to do what I was doing.

I’ve seen another person during a training session. I think I AM one of the quieter ones. Although I’ve noticed I’m getting louder and more vocal. I don’t always cover up the pain with a laugh or a smile.

That’s very good emotional progress for me.

When I started working my trainer, I figured it was all about physical strength and fitness.

But it’s so much MORE than that. It’s changing who I am and how I see myself. It’s a gentle and gradual process but it’s there.

What do you mean “that’s your job”?????

I worked my muscles hard today and I suspect I’m going to feel it tomorrow.

It’s a funny kind of pain though. It lasts such a short time and tends to be followed by that “I did it” elation.

Okay, it’s actually usually followed by me collapsing in a heap. But the high is still there somewhere.

I might not be succeeding when it comes to weight loss (yet!) but I’m definitely noticing an improvement in my fitness and strength. And at the end of the day, I think that’s more beneficial to my health.

Not that my health wouldn’t benefit from losing a few kilo’s.

I just think it’s benefiting more from the increased fitness and strength.

I know my self esteem is really benefiting.

Image via WikipediaI have been CHEATING on my personal trainer!!!

But you HAVE to admit, he IS rather worthy of cheating with!!!!

Of course, it’s not MY fault she went and abandoned me.

Firstly she went and left me with some STRANGER during netball training. And while my brain nearly exploded with what this stranger wanted me to do, I have to admit I wasn’t as “stuffed” as my personal trainer usually leaves me after her fitness sessions at training.

And she’s still away so no session this week.

So I decided to be “good” and drag my Billy Blanks DVD out from the bottom drawer and give it a dust off.

I don’t remember the last time I actually USED this DVD.

Having not done it for a while, it was hard going. It amazes me how much exercise you can do but when you change what you’re doing, it’s still hard. Not that my current “head spins” helped me get through it either.

I LOVE Billy Blanks. I find him so positive and encouraging in the way he presents his videos. And he often finishes with an inspirational pep-talk.

Mind you, he didn’t finish the session with a massage, so I think I’ll go back to my own personal trainer next week.

Image via WikipediaAnd breaking it down into bite sized pieces helps too!

Can you believe today was my 14th session with my Personal Trainer????

And yes, it’s still one of the BEST decisions I’ve ever made.

It’s one of the highlights of my week.

Generally our sessions start with a 10 minute warm up on the treadmill, cross trainer or exercise bike.

So I was a bit apprehensive today when she mentioned 20 minutes on the treadmill - doing 90 second intervals of jogging, uphill walking and then a gentler “recovery” walk. I wasn’t sure I’d make it the full 20 minutes. But I did. Sure broke out in a sweat though.

It was amazing how breaking it up into small bite sized pieces made a difference. Each 90 second interval went really fast in comparison to focusing on the full 20 minutes.

And in progress news.

Farmboy told me to punch him the other day. He’ll do that sometimes when I’m really stressed. Just in the arm. As a way of getting rid of tension.

And. It. HURT!!!!

Him, not me.

I was so excited. Well, as excited as one can get when they hurt the person they love more than life itself. But it didn’t hurt him that bad.

Just enough that I KNOW I’m making progress!

According to his description I now punch like a guy rather than like a girl. W00t!!! Obviously the boxing (and other arm strength work) is starting to pay off.

My nasty trainer?

Okay, she was NEVER really nasty. Not sure she knows how.

But she didn’t tell me to “suck it up” this week.

Must have just been a “week 13″ thing???? *shrugs*

It’s not always WHAT you know.

But who you know and what THEY know.

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned before that my personal trainer is also a netball star.

But she’s not a “star” in the “I’m good and you’re just crap” type of mentality (well, she might think that but at least she doesn’t say it ).

Anyway, she knows quite a LOT about netball. I wonder how many hours she’s spent playing netball or training for netball in her life?

And I do wonder if I would have given up on trying to learn netball in the past couple of weeks if it weren’t for her and her encouragement through some low moments (although Farmboy and my coach might have had something to say about it if I up and quit - they know it’s important to me even though I’m finding it very frustrating at the moment).

So today we snuck in a bit of extra netball help into our session. I really NEED all the help I can get. And I feel very blessed that I have people around me who are willing to give it.

Saturday night I was having a moan to Farmboy about how hopeless I am and how I don’t have anything going for me to help me along in this process. I’ve NEVER been good at sport. I’m unco-ordinated. I’m short. My list of “reasons why I shouldn’t even be TRYING to learn netball” went on.

So, what DO I have going for me? People who’ve been willing to give me a go. People who’ve been cheering from the sidelines. And people who’re willing to show me how to do things without making me feel like an idiot.

Yes, I am blessed indeed.

Image by Vincent J. Brown via FlickrI went to my personal training session today and someone had stolen my lovely trainer and replaced her with …… I’m not sure what!!!!

Do you KNOW what she said to me during our session today???? (No, of course you don’t know but you do realise I’m about to tell you don’t you?)

She told me to “suck it up”.

Can you BELIEVE that?????

I was so shocked that had I been able to breathe I probably would have stopped breathing!!! (yeah, you’re probably going to have to read that sentence a few times to understand what I’m trying to say)

And here I’ve been going around telling everyone how NICE she is!!!!

ROFLOL (that’s “roll on the floor laughing out loud” for those of you who don’t “do” internet acronyms)

You know what I reckon?

She’s very, very cunning.

We’ll spend the first 12 sessions just easing her into it nicely and just when she’s totally addicted and can’t LIVE without seeing her personal trainer at least once a week…..

BAM!!!!!

Hit her hard!

Actually, it was kind of cool in a masochistic kind of way. What is it they say? No pain. No gain? And as she did kindly point out - the pain is only momentary.

We did some boxing which was just what I needed. And some ab work which was HARD (but which I also need). Who am I kidding? I need it ALL. LOL.

Maybe it was just a “session 13″ thing and next week we’ll be back to “nice”.

Or maybe not.

* The picture of the cat? Nothing whatsoever to do with this post other than for some reason Zemanta offered it and it was too cute to refuse.

Image via WikipediaOn Sunday night, I sat down and watched Gladiators with the rest of the family. I’ve not actually sat down and watched it before. Usually Farmboy watches it with the kids and I sneak off to do a bit on the computer (usually after a busy weekend). The kids LOVE it.

I was amazed at how fit AND strong the contestants were. Far out, what some people will do (and can do).

Despite my heading, I have no real desire to reach that level of strength and fitness. But this week in my personal training session, we worked on strength training. It’s something I have done very little of. Ever.

So I have a looonnnnggggg way to go before I’d EVER get to Gladiator level. LOL.

But hopefully one of these days I’ll be able to pass a netball a little better. Or hang clothes on the line without getting sore arms.

My progress with strength and fitness is rather slow (in my opinion) but with everything else going on right now, I’m just so relieved not to be going backwards.

And the progress is definitely there. I’m able to do things now that I’m sure I wouldn’t have been able to do a couple of months ago (like play 15 minutes of netball without feeling like I am going to die).

There was one good thing about netball training last week (after my whinge yesterday that I was hopeless). One of the things our fitness trainer emphasizes is the important of competing against yourself (rather than someone else). So the focus is often on bettering your last effort.

Last week we did an exercise where you run back and forward along 1/3 of the netball court as many times as you can in 1 minute. Last time we did this I managed 14 times the first effort and then 16 times for the second effort of the night. However, I overdid it a bit (competitive? me?) and felt pretty crook (as in, “I REALLY feel like Im gonna hurl” afterward). This time I did 16 the first time, and didn’t really feel like I pushed myself anywhere near as hard. I also managed only 16 later in the training but considering I was already out of breath when I started, I figured that was an okay effort.

All this to say, I feel like I’m making progress.

Next week is weigh and measure week. I might need to reread this after that.