Grief Is A Strange Emotion
I ended up missing the funeral on Tuesday. Was laid up on the couch pretty sick. I’ve pretty much done nothing but sleep and watch DVD’s all week.
I didn’t know Daniel personally so it wasn’t a huge issue for me to miss the funeral from MY point of view.
I was, however, disappointed that I couldn’t be there for my grieving friends. And to help out with food etc so others were free to focus on the actual funeral.
In hindsight, it is probably a good thing for ME that I wasn’t there.
I tend to absorb other people’s emotions so a HUGE funeral like this one (and hugely SAD) could have really done me in for quite some time.
Last night Farmboy was talking about the funeral.
I knew they were doing a kind of “guard of honour” with the football players as Farmboy was asked to wear his club shirt (which he felt kind of funny going so “casual” to the funeral). I was asking him about it.
Apparently as the hearse left the sporting grounds (where the funeral was held), all the players lined up on the oval and they actually drove the hearse through the goal posts.
Just hearing about it has totally undone me.
I’ve been feeling sad for his family.
I’ve been feeling sad for his friends.
But hearing that really drove home to me what a total waste of a life this whole tragedy has been.
One final goal for a young man who should be in the prime of his life.
I can’t shake that image from my mind.
I can’t shake the grief that seems to be permeating my whole being.
I feel so empty.
And all over someone I barely knew.
Grief is a strange emotion.
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Hi Jodi,
I know what you mean. A year or so ago one of the Mum’s at school died unexpectantly. I didn’t know her - but I knew who she was. It shook me up for days and I cried a lot. I felt so bad for her young children (one had just started kindy and was the cutest little thing). You are obviously like me when hearing about an unexpected death - we put ourselves into the shoes of those who knew them. It’s for this reason I don’t like to watch the news - I can start crying over the death of a total stranger. Take care of yourself and give extra cuddles to your family.
Libby
Grief does hit in funny ways and at odd moments. I still find myself tearing up occasionally at the thought of my sister-in-law, who died unexpectedly in a car accident 20 years ago.
Indeed it is…
I’ve been more upset over Daniel than I was for Finny for some reason. This one has really hit me so much harder than I expected.
They sounded the siren as he passed through the goals. It was poignant, heartbreaking and just so final.
I know what you mean - a former work colleague, one I still keep in touch with but hadn’t actually seen in about a year was overjoyed when his wife had a much wanted first baby in January. I was devastated last week to hear that the baby had died the day before, from a heart condition. I hadn’t even had a chance to meet the baby, but I know how much her birth meant to my friend & his wife. I can’t even begin to understand the grief they are going through at the moment.
We had a bad car accident on my favourite road recently. Neither of whom were people I knew, one of them was a young kid who from the look of things was doing something extremely reckless and that got himself and someone else killed.
I had a similar feeling to the one you describe for the lady who died in the accident - it was made even worse by the fact that she was with her husband in the car, and I couldn’t help but think how he must have felt.
The important thing is that things like this happen for a reason. We’re not here for a long time, nobody is going to invent immortality in our lifetime, so we need to make the most of every single minute. We can grieve for a short time, but then we need to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and get the heck on with it. Because the people who passed would resent us wasting time that they did not get.
That’s my opinion, anyway.
Libby - I’m the same. I tend to avoid watching the news. Who needs heartache blasted right into their living room? Besides, you find out about all the important stuff via facebook.
River - Yeah, I guess you kind of learn to live with it rather than getting over it.
Sharon - I can’t believe I forgot the bit about the siren in my post! That was the bit that sent me to tears. Like you said, so final.
Victoria - That’s really sad.
Snoskred - Hello! Long time no chat!
You’re very right. If anything, things like this serve as a great reminder of how fragile and valuable life is and how we shouldn’t take any day for granted.