Lightening Online

I took a couple of shots of the back wall of our house yesterday:

The builders have just arrived and by tomorrow night, this could all look rather different!!!!

Stay tuned….

Over the past few days my blog reader has been filling up with posts about how stressed people are about how quickly Christmas is coming.  Or commenting on how they just aren’t getting into the “spirit” this year.  There’s even been a number with the word “humbug” in the title.

I know how they feel.  I’ve been there.  There’s every likelihood I’ll go there again.

Commercialism and perfectionism is squeezing the life out of Christmas.

I was discussing Christmas with my sister in law this past week.  A few years back I said we weren’t buying adult gifts for the siblings anymore.  She made a comment on how it does get expensive.  The thing for us wasn’t the money.  It was the stress of finding something that wasn’t a total waste of everybody’s time and money.  Finding the perfect gifts for everyone was completely STRESSING me out.

It was such a relief to have that burden lifted.

It was around that time that we decided we were going to SIMPLIFY CHRISTMAS.

I now don’t do anything “Christmassy” unless I feel like it.

Fortunately I generally LOVE Christmas and LOVE buying gifts so of course, that helps.

Some years we decorate the whole house.  Some years we don’t.

As long as we do Santa and the Tree, the kids are generally happy.

Some years we do Christmas craft and cooking.  Some years we don’t.

Some years we have more elaborate Christmas fare.  And some years we keep it really simple.

I remember 1 year we went away in the camper trailer for Christmas.  It was the first Christmas after my breakdown and I wasn’t ready to be around people yet.  Money was tight that year so we kept everything VERY simple.  I made a couple of basic salads before we left and cooked a turkey and bought some shaved ham.  All I did Christmas Day was cut up some basic salad items (tomato, cucumber, lettuce).  Dessert was a bought cheesecake.

It was the least effort I had EVER put into Christmas that year and do you know what????

It was AWESOME!!!!

It still ranks up there as one of the BEST Christmasses we have ever had.

So if you’re struggling to get into the “spirit” or feel like you’re just not going to achieve everything before the big day gets here, cut yourself some slack!!!!

There was nothing commercial or stressed about the very first Christmas (okay, maybe a little stress over the inn being full and of course, the labour!!!!  ).

Why do we let media and peer pressure force us into doing what we don’t want to do?

I don’t believe that means we lack the Christmas spirit.  Could be it’s quite the opposite in fact.

Dare to be different (if that’s what makes you happy).

Carve your own way this Christmas.

Focus on peace, joy, thankfulness, family and friends this Christmas.

The rest is all simply “trimming”.

Yesterday Farmboy and I took off to do some Christmas Shopping.  The closest regional centre is a little over an hour and a half away (in either direction) and with harvest coming up on us so quickly, we hadn’t had a chance to do much Christmas shopping.

The kids finish school next week (and it’s a busy week too) so we decided it best to hurry up and go while we still could.

We had a lovely day out together which included a nice “date lunch” at the marina.

As a bonus, I got to see my niece and nephew who we haven’t seen since the June long weekend (due to being away on our trip and then a series of illnesses that have kept us from going for a visit).  My niece has gone from a newborn to a 6-month old.  I got to have a lovely cuddle!!!! 

The shopping expedition was quite successful.  Farmboy and I found what we had decided to buy each other for Christmas.  And they were cheaper than we were expecting to pay (probably not the highest quality BUT this way we can see how much we use them and if they don’t last due to lots of use, can buy better next time).

I’m going to keep you guessing on what they are but mine is pink!!!!  (Farmboys isn’t ROFLOL).

I had to concede defeat and purchase Singstar Princesses hearts desire without getting a bargain.  Only 1 store had them and while they were supposedly on “special”, the special price was full price at other stores.  It was either pay that price or risk not being able to get it.

Next step will be to get everything out and work out exactly where I’m up to.  I know I need 1 thing for Trailer Boy and a beach towel for Singstar Princess (hers got damaged while we were away).

I still have extended family gifts to buy but I knew I could do those when the kids are with us in just over a weeks time (I have an appointment so knew we would be back).

We did buy 1 impulse purchase.  That happens to me most years.  We have everything worked out and then add on another little gift.  It’s something the whole family will enjoy though. 

I just CAN’T WAIT until Christmas now.  It’s my favourite time of the year!!!! 

How is your Christmas shopping going?  Is it making you smile or making you frustrated????

What a pity I know Father Christmas won’t be bringing me one.

I wonder if I sat on his knee whether he would???? 

BUT, all is not lost because I’ve decided to do the unthinkable!!!!

I’m going to steal save up for one.

That’s my new savings challenge.

This could be a bit more challenging than my last one though.

This time I can’t use savings from our regular budget (because it’s for me and not the family).  This time the money has to come from other sources.

Things like:

* survey payments

* pocket money

* gift money

* blogging revenue

* ebay sales (maybe - if I ever get around to actually selling something)

* any other weird and wacky ideas I can come up with to generate a few dollars (within reason of course ROFLOL).

Goal Amount: $2000

That’s pretty high for a laptop I know but I’d like to get something reasonably decent that I can edit video footage and stuff on.

This is only an approximate amount.  I really need to do some more research and work out what I really want before I know the exact cost.

Starting Amount: $50

Amount Still Needed: $1950

I expect it’s going to take me a little while so I won’t update you (and bore you) too often.

Fortunately I have 2 laptops to use in the meantime.  I just don’t have any with working CD-Rom drives - hence the justification for buying a new one. 

What are you dreaming of this Christmas?

I’m not sure if I ever got around to revealling what my “new toy” was that I posted about a while back (you remember the one Trailer Boy took photo’s of that weren’t real clear?).

Anyway, here it is:

I kind of need to use the phrase “my toy” rather loosely for 2 reasons:

1.  It’s not really “mine” - I have to share it with Farmboy.  Although he did finally decide to buy it with me in mind.

2.  It’s not really meant to be a “toy” - but it does make work fun! 

And the new job?

Helping Farmboy get the spot-spraying done.

Which seems like a strange job for someone so anti the use of chemicals.  *sigh*

BUT, it’s lots of fun burning around the paddock on the 4-wheeler.

I even did a couple of mono’s (accidentally mind you!!!).  LOL.

And I need to remember to put sunscreen on the backs of my hands.  I currently have what looks like red fingerless gloves.  The tops of my fingers were protected because of the way they wrap around the handle bars.  ROFLOL.  You live and learn.

… I had more stitches than the doctor cared to tell me about.

Apparently Trailer Boy had a big head!  And a very small fontanelle.

I think from the very beginning he was determined to be the youngest!!!! 

Even in hospital, I knew things weren’t quite right.

I just didn’t understand why.

I told the doctor I’d been teary with all my kids at that stage.

And I had.

And yet, this time was different.  Kind of.  In a very subtle way.

Things I used to take in my stride upset me and stressed me out.

I couldn’t cope with the older 2 kids sitting on the arms of my chair when I was feeding him.  I used to always want them close.  Now I just wanted to hide from the world.  Hide from my family.

But it was the tears that drove me the craziest.  Crying at the drop of a hat.  Things that shouldn’t have been a big deal, seemed to be.

My doctor told me it was some kind of mood disorder.  Apparently the new name for “post natal depression”.  He suggested being honest with my friends about how I was feeling.

I tried.

The first friend I tried to tell laughed at me.

I never said another word.  Not to other friends.  Not to my doctor.

He never asked how I was going so I thought I was supposed to just “get over it”.

Two and half years later my brain decided to take a little holiday.  Speech, memory, coherent thought.  All gone.

The diagnosis?  A nervous breakdown brought on by untreated post natal depression.  Or something to that effect.

My poor little boy went from having a struggling mother to having no mother at all.

It’s hard to think of him as 6.  It’s hard not to dwell on the years of his life that virtually went by in a daze.

He’s fine.  He spent lots of time with daddy and his uncle and grandad.  Had a ball.

It’s me that’s not so fine.

Not so fine with all those missed memories.  Precious time together that I so dearly loved with my other 2.

It’s hard on his birthday not to remember the starting date of the mess my life ended up in.

BUT…

It’s not all bad.

I KNOW that I am now a stronger, more confident person.  I KNOW that I have dealt with some skeletons in my closet.  I KNOW that I have used this experience to come to terms with WHO I am.

And my boy?  My big 6 year old boy who was just born yesterday?

He is AWESOME!

And he has had a wonderful birthday.  :0)

The first thing he did when he opened his presents was to go around and give everyone one of the chocolate frogs he was given as one of his gifts.

Bless him. 

He was SO stoked with his gifts:

A Lego set WITH a truck of course.

And we have to have a tractor WITH a trailer for Trailer Boy don’t we?

Now that the kids are getting older, they like to decorate their own cakes.  When they were younger (and the years where we have an actual “party”) I make them something chosen from our Birthday Cake books.  For the family birthday meal, they enjoy deciding on their own decorations and doing it themselves.

I think he did a great job creating a road with the snakes as the centre markings and then filling it with racing cars.

He put so many lollies all over the cake that the icing started to fall off.  LOL.

And we can’t have a birthday post without the obligatory candle shot can we?

Happy Birthday my beautiful boy.  I am SO glad that you’re a part of our family!!!!