Jeanie - thanks. It’s been good to reflect on all that happened and actually realise “hang on a minute, I hung in there. Go me!!!” LOL. I think that has only just occurred to me as I was typing this very response.

Tamsyn - well, what’s stopping you? Is it possible to do what I did and start training with a team and take it from there?

Sharon - what would you have done if I’d burst into tears on you? I think I probably knew that you’d want me to go back on. And that I needed to for my own sake. And I’m glad I did so it all worked out okay. I have to admit though, that having been there, la la land is quite a nice place to visit. LOL. In my mind, everyone is allowed to have an off game, except me. Of course. Because I’m a perfectionist. As a coach, is it a good thing or a bad thing to have “inside knowledge” of my head through reading my blog? You probably don’t actually need to read what I’ve written to have a fair idea how my head works anyway.

Gemisht - that’s true. And I’m not giving up now I’ve made it this far. I just need to accept that some days will be better than others. And that keeping on keeping on is what will get me to my goal. Talking about team gelling, that was one thing I did find better this week. Not that the team have been anything BUT welcoming. However, I think I’m starting to relax and be myself around them a bit more (which may or may not be a good thing). I’m sorry you have negative memories of hockey.

River - yeah. I guess many of us go to tears when we’re over-tired. I really HATE crying in public though.

Jenn - so true. I do need to cut myself some slack. It’s just that I so badly WANT to get better. And off days (or hard opponents) make me feel like I’m heading in the wrong direction. Then again, maybe they’ll make me work harder in the long term. And if I’m not a better player by the end of the season - I’ll just blame my coach. ROFLOL.

And if nothing else you are a team and it can take a while for a team to work together really well, so give all of you some time. Before you know it you will all be doing things as a team without thinking too hard about it at all.

I think you are doing so well. I would love to have a go at playing hockey again but I don’t have the courage at the moment to put myself “out there” and as much as I loved the game, there are some very negative memories associated with it that I need to get past. Maybe one day…….

About that first quarter. It. Was. Not. Your. Fault. Steph was in la la land, Dawn was hanging out there with her, Jess wasn’t completely in la la land but she had one foot there, and when three of your stronger team mates don’t give you the leadership and direction you are used to then the rest of the team falls in a heap too.

You did great in the final quarter. You picked up some loose balls, you backed up all the way down the court, and continued to do so even when they didn’t use you. WD is sometimes a thankless position, you feel like you do a whole lot of running around for not much gain, but you did everything I have asked of you. Which is more than can be said for some other members of the team (that would be my daughter!).