Commenting on Blogs
A fellow blogger and I were recently discussing Comment Love on blogs. All bloggers (as far as I’m aware) LOVE getting comments on what they’ve written. Why? Because someone has cared enough not only to read but to contribute to the conversation in some way.
In my mind it’s really what blogging is all about. Sharing our thoughts and our journey in life with one another and building a relationship.
So, what do you think of blogs where the blogger doesn’t appear to ever respond to comments? Is that still a blog or a regularly updated website? Would you still leave comments?
I’ve been doing so because it’s just automatic for me to go to a blog (from my bloglines reader) and leave a comment if I have something to say. And you know me, I seem to have something to say with reasonable frequency!
So, the other day I left a comment on The Pioneer Woman asking if she gets time to actually READ the comments she receives. I can understand her not responding too often as she gets hundreds and hundreds of comments per day. But I just wondered if she actually READ them because well, if she’s not reading what I have to say, why am I bothering to say it?
She hasn’t responded either on the blog or personally so I’m thinking just maybe she doesn’t have time to read them all. Not that I blame her.
I just wonder why people keep commenting. Do they want to say something regardless of whether it ever gets read. Do they do so in the hope that another commenter might visit their blog? I’m not sure.
What do you think?
Do you think there is such a thing as too many comments?
Would you ever like your blog to get so big that you couldn’t keep up with the comments?
Would you continue to comment on a blog even if you never got a response from the blog writer? Ever?
Oh and don’t worry. I don’t expect there will EVER come a day when I have too many comments to reply to. So please continue to leave yours. 
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32 comments:
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Hmm… definitely food for thought. I try to comment on blogs when things really strike a cord with me. Though sometimes I think oh I might respond to that but when I see LOTS of comments similar to my own I don’t bother.
I like to respond to the few comments I get on my blog but at the moment I’m not getting notified of them and so replying is very difficult - VERY frustrating. Luckily i’ts mostly the same few friends who comment and I’ve explained the situation to them. I don’t think you need to respond to every comment but it’s nice to do so occasionally.
Oh, and I definitely wouldn’t bother to leave a comment if I knew the blogger was not going to read it. and I wouldn’t like my blog to get so big I couldn’t keep up with comments. No worries about that though :-).
Libby
It reminds me of the time I wrote to Scott Baio.
I was 12 ish. I thought he was hot.
I waited and waited for a reply and was so disappointed when he didn’t.
I am unsure when a reply to comments is in order to be honest. I am still learning. I don’t want to look like I MUST have the last word.
It is polite to acknowledge. I know when I comment and someone replies, I feel acknowledged at least.
I have to admit that I am not much of a commenter. I love to read blogs but like Libby said if there are already comments similar to what I would write I just don’t bother.
As far as replying to comments goes, I wish that I had the time to do it more often. But I really only ever do if my comment notification has a return address for that person. That way I can reply back directly to them. I don’t ever reply to comments in my comments section only because I don’t know how many people would actually come back to your comments to see if you replied. Does anyone do that???
I’ll also reply if the commenter has left a question!
Ok so now I’m off to comment on a few more blogs while I have the time
Rachel xxx
A Juggling Mum
yes, it is nice to be acknowledged.
No I don’t tend to return to blogs where they don’t ever respond to their commentors.
And so many people do it differently when they do respond. Some respond to every comment either on their comment forms or by email, some do one comment acknowledging and replying to everyone, some reply en mass with a comment. Some just reply to a few comments here and there, which tells me they are reading but mightn’t have a lot of time or something.
I try to reply to a lot of comments, but sometimes they don’t really warrant a reply, sometimes I’m busy and don’t get that far and sometimes I feel a bit overwhelmed by it and get the guilts. Sigh.
Only those with a Windows Live account can comment on my blog so I don’t get very many comments, but I do answer all that I receive. I like the personal touch. I think sometimes people comment on blogs for the interaction with the other readers, and not necessarily with the blogger. It depends on the blog I suspect.
Just wanted to apologize for not directly answering your comment. Some days, I’m able to participate in the comments section of my site, and some days I’m doing great if I get a post up that’s relatively coherent. With a house of four children, a husband, and a ranch full of animals, I do have finite computer time…and most of it is spent working on my daily contributions to my websites.
I love having the comments section, though, because it’s a way for readers of my site to participate/share their thoughts/reactions on what I’ve posted for the day, and often, to share their own experiences. Sometimes, readers interact with one another and answer questions. Most of the time, I think it works great
That said, it is a cruddy feeling to send an email or ask a question that never gets answered (it’s happened to me!), so it’s a bummer to me that I just can’t do that.
I always do whatever I feel like at the time. I don’t suppose I would comment if I was pretty sure it would never be read, but I like only responding to comments if I find I have something to add. I always say welcome to a new commenter.
I try to reply to every comment on my blog and appreciate replies to my own on other people’s blogs - unless, of course, they’re overwhelmed with loads of comments!
Scott Baio
Charles In Charge? There’s a Lightening Blog topic if ever I saw one!
As for comments - some people write for themselves, so the comments are nice, but not why they are doing the blog. With blogs that get a lot of comments (>100) it can be difficult for any topic to be discussed as multiple conversations are going on in a very linear manner (which is why some blogs should have threaded comments).
Libby - I think all blog commenters would understand that the blog writer gets busy from time to time.
Widdle Shamrock - it’s my blog so I intend to always have the last word.
Well, as much as possible. So that commenters know that I have at least seen their comments. Sometimes when a comment comes through on an older post I read it in my email but don’t get around to going back and responding directly.
Rachel - thanks for weighing in on the conversation. It’s a debate that has been argued back and forth for a long time. Do you respond in your comments section, their comments section, via email? I only respond via email occasionally. Mostly I respond to comments in my comment section as it gives continuity to the conversation and helps others that come along reading. A lot of blogs have the “subscribe to comments” feature now so it’s easy to follow conversations. I try to go back and read on those I haven’t subscribed to if I’ve left a question or something.
Bettina - I don’t think it’s something to feel guilty about. We’re all limited in time. But I guess I was more thinking about the REALLY popular blogs (using Pioneer Woman as an example). If they NEVER seem to reply.
Maggie - I think that’s a good point and one I hadn’t really considered (or hadn’t weighted heavily enough). I know that happened here recently - commenters helping one another out. It is great.
Pioneer Woman - I appreciate you taking the time to weigh in on the conversation. It’s helpful to hear it from the bloggers side as well as the commenters. Yours is the most popular blog I read at the moment so used that as an example. I always thought I’d like my blog to be “popular” but I guess now I’m rethinking that a little as the sense of community does get lost a little on the bigger blogs.
Some more comments have come through since I began this one but I’ll post it anyway and get to those as I can.
i likto leave it a few weeks and then ackowledge the comments on the blog rather than in the comments section..
also have cbox on my blog to which i can comment from there.
now that im on broadband im commenting more than i was. but dial up was just painful and it would take too long to load and make the comment, and then wount always save that comment..
because i use bloglines i find that i dont always go to the actual blog it would be great if bloglines had a comment section on it..
I dont know how to reply privately to people who comment on my blog and for some reason I dont like the reply in the comments to the others that comment. Not meaning to have a go (well actually I am, but I dont want you to change) but it really erks me for some reason.
I guess it shouldn’t because I imagine their are a lot of people like me that have no idea on how to do it personally. Maybe a post topic for your other blog
oh good questions… can I ask another though? Something I have been wondering about since I went to wordpress….
Should I comment on my comments in the comments? LOL Did that make sense?? Or should I email individual commentors? or both? I am never too sure what people expect and don’t want to see rude if I don’t comment….
Oh Stuffy - you crack me up!!!! Mmmmm…..Scott Baio. Yes, I agree that in my “youth” I had a thing for him.
Yeah, the various threads floating around the more popular blogs would make responding to comments a little more challenging and confusing. As for threaded comments, Ben Barden has actually started a section on his blog dedicated to blog discussions which kind of lends itself to that.
Nicole - yes, dial up is painful for commenting. I can well remember those days. Blogger blogs seem to be rather slow for leaving comments too which I find frustrating (even on Broadband).
Amy - it’s easier on a Wordpress blog because commenters need to enter an email address in order to comment. However, there is some discussion in the blogging community about whether it is an invasion of privacy to email every commenter. Personally, I don’t mind but perhaps some people don’t *want* to be emailed by the blogger. I’m not really sure what I think on that one. You don’t think the blogger replying to comments on their blog adds to the conversation? Perhaps I make my comments too personal by directing them individually. But then, I still write expecting others to read what I say. The name allows for a reference point as to what I’m talking about (ie I’m replying to something they’ve said in their comment).
Kate - see my response to Amy.
I prefer to comment in the comments section so that my response is public (available for everyone to read) and prefer not to email people directly unless they’ve asked a direct question which requires a more detailed answer. Or I want to be more “personal” in my response.
Hey gorgeous! I will reiterate what I we discussed the other day. I have asked my ‘readers’ (readers sounds so arrogant, I prefer lovelies!) a couple of times and the overwhelming majority say they want me to comment back in the comments.
So I do.
AND I visit every blog and comment. Gets a bit overwhelming when a post gets 40+ comments, but I try my best. If I don’t have time to read and comment I will visit anyway just so they get that extra hit. Make sense?
You know me. Always up for a chat. I love to comment, and I love to comment on comments!
I don’t think I’ll ever be big enough to not be able to keep up. I always have the last word too. It’s nice to show people that you really do read what they have to say.
Sometimes I comment, sometimes I don’t.
Depends on:
a) whether I can relate to anything in the post
b) whether everyone else has already said what I would have said.
Hehe some of us just love to comment, and yes there are some of us that go back to see if there was a reply to our comments (or subscribe to that particular comment thread if the blog is enabled for that).
My own blog is so tiny that replying isnt much hassle, and quite often they are large replies that suit the comments section rather than making a new post out of it.
Sometimes the reply is more personal so I will email direct to the commenter and sometimes the comments just dont need a reply.
I am in no way or form an authority on blogs, but I really dont think that there is a hard and fast rule about replying to comments, if bloggers like replying they will when they can. If people dont like the bloggers replying, then that is their own personal choice too, they dont have to go back to read if there is a reply.
Personally I find comment threads like a personal conversation, sometimes its just one on one - you and the blogger, sometimes its a whole group interacting with each other and that is a real community feeling there. For some people who are physically isolated by distance or other physical limitations, that feeling of community can be a life and sanity saver.
For me, it is like sending an email and never getting a reply. Did they read it? Did they even receive it?? You could have requested a read receipt to make sure they got it and read it, or at least opened it, but then if you get that receipt but they never reply, you might wonder why, wonder if you offended or upset them, or if you dont mean enough to the person to warrant even a 5 second email to say thanks or hi or I am busy but I will get back to you later in more detail.
Oh and I will need to learn more about hits and visits and stuff, cause if you dont reply on mine then I have NO idea you were there. Not that there is anything new on mine lately, but there are a few with no replies at all, so if you feel like backdating a reply, I will still love you just as much!!
Ok getting off soapbox now cause its making my head hurt to stand up here for so long tonight. Oh and any replies to this, please attach chocolate and painkillers with it!! (lol sorry couldnt resist that!).
Hmm now do i tick the notify me of followup comments box or not??? Decisions Decisions!! Hehe well I better, why waste a perfectly good email folder that is sitting there waiting for comment followups to fill it. (sad & pathetic am I to have a specified folder for comment replies, Oh Yes!!)
HUGS!!
Lightening,
Responding to those who take the time to read our posts and leave a comment is simply good manners. One thing that really bothers me a lot is when I’ve found someone else has posted an Question on someone’s blog comment section several days ago, and still no response from the blogger. I then posted a direct reply to the questioner in order to help answer her question.
How pathetic can bloggers get to not take the time to answer questions, acknowledge those who leave comments, and generally participate in interaction in the comment section. Without your reading audience, where would bloggers be?
To answer your question, bloggers who don’t respond to comments left are those I don’t return to or subscribe to. If I’ve subscribed to a blog and then discover they don’t participate with replies to comments, I hit the delete button on the RSS feed list. Poof, be gone!
So, I’ve read through this all and still have a couple of questions.
1) What is a better way of communicating with readers who leave comments? To email them directly or to reply within comments? In reading through all this, I don’t really see a clear answer. I usually will reply via email, but not within my comments section simply because I never know if anyone will bother to come back and read.
2) Do people look down on me for NOT replying within comments, without realizing that I’ve written back via email?
3) Why, oh, why don’t people enable me to write back via email??? Check the box, people!
4) Is it wrong to not reply to those who leave comments, but very generic ones? Like a generic reply to a regular thing, like Menu Plan Monday, Thankful Thursday, etc. Sometimes people will leave something that sounds like they write the same thing to everyone and maybe didn’t really even read what you wrote. I have to admit that, right or wrong, I don’t really place high priority on getting back to those people.
This has been really enlightening. Thanks for bringing it up!!
I try to keep up with comments. Not very successfully.
When I first started blogging, I was really buoyed up by the comments. It was just a personal/family journal; I would keep it up even without readers or comments, but I love interacting with my friends and family that read it. On that blog I respond via email or in the comments section, just depending on the situation.
On the WifeAdvice.com blog that my husband and I write, we love the comments! We often talk about the comments during the day as we call each other, or as we’re out doing things. However, we don’t respond as much to those comments, because we feel like we have a strong voice/platform on our blog and we want the comments section to be a place for our readers to speak up. We’re always wondering about the balance though, so your post today (and all the great comments) have really given me a lot to think about… I at least want to make sure people know that I read their comment, and that it made me laugh/made me mad/made my day…
As far as the really popular blogs, where the bloggers can’t/don’t keep up with the comments, I’ve noticed that there is still a community built up in the comments section–people are directing their comments to that community and not just to the main blogger.
Interesting topic Lightening.
I admit that I am behind in replying to comments on my blog ATM - life got busier than I was expecting. And like Bettina, I feel guilty about that. The guilt is mainly because I know that I like going back to Blogs to see the replies to my comments and/or anyone elses. It does become more of a conversation. And I think its great when commentors interact in the comments between themselves, rather than just the blogger and the commentors.
I think that replying by email to commentors really needs to be a decision based on the comments and the replies required. It depends on the topic and whether it needs to be replied to privately, or publicy in the comments.
Off I go to catch up on replying to comments.
You are so right! I love my comments. They make feel all feel goody and liked. It is a nice feeling. I am lousy at commenting back though. Instead i usually go to the person who has left a message for me and leave a comment for them. Sometimes I will add a thank you for taking the time to comment on my post, so they know I read it.
Wow! I wasn’t expecting this topic to generate so much lively discussion. Thank you everyone for taking the time to add your thoughts and your questions. I think it will be worth writing a follow-up post to this so I’ll work on that next week.
Lori - I will answer your questions as part of that post if that’s okay with you.
Obviously my dear Lightening, you have struck a chord with people.
I’m still just as confused as ever, but think I shall just keep doing what I’m doing.
that’s an interesting topic Lightening. I just don’t have the time to respond back personally every time someone leaves a comment. But I do try to respond to a couple within any post. Hopefully that way everyone that comments on my blog gets an occasional response from me. I especially try to acknowledge new commenters.
I’m not always good at it, but I do try
[…] Sunday. There is always a good discussion going around about the nature of commenting on blogs (Lightening’s is the most recent example) and I’m the first to admit I’m not the most diligent at […]
I’m still pretty new to blogging, just started my blog in December. At first I would flip flop about whether or not the comment thing bothered me. But now I think it doesn’t, chances are if I left a comment somewhere they at least came and checked out my blog, maybe they just didn’t find anything to comment on and didn’t want to leave an unrelated comment to a post.
I’ve been trying to figure out how to make sure I acknowledge comments on my blog. And it’s funny I just came across this post after following you from my blog because literally 10 minutes ago I was thinking about making a blog post about acknowledging comments.
I don’t get a ton of comments as of yet, but still with trying to keep my blog(s) as active as I can, trying to keep up on all my other online endeavors, plus the usually responsibilities of being a homeschooling and stay at home mom…I still find it difficult to make a comment in response to each comment made to me.
So, what have I come up with? Well, I decided that I will try to set aside time once a week to go through all comments for that week on my blog(s). I will follow each persons link to their own blog, if I find something to comment on(like I did today!lol) I will do so, if they are an Entrecard member I will drop a card with one of my two(or even both if I haven’t hit my limit) EC accounts, I will at least try to find some way of letting them know that I have followed them and appreciate them visiting my blog. If I can’t find anything to click on or comment on within their blog hopefully just a thank you comment in my own will be enough.
Now, if I ever get the amount of comments Pioneer Woman gets(which I highly doubt I will ever) I would definitely have to re-think how to handle it.
And thank you for your comment on my blog, I was going to try and do your Smiley Saturday thing as you suggested, but the day just got away from me yesterday!
I try not to comment on my own blog unless I need to address something very specific. But your thoughts do make sense that I will have to think about regularly posting a comment on my blog also.
I enjoyed visiting your blog…
I generally like when someone responds to my comments. And I try and respond to other people’s comments although I probably don’t do it 100% of the time if the comment kind of stand for itself and doesn’t need a reply.
That said I read a blog where the person frequently asks for input and when you comment she never responds to it. So I’m pretty much done commenting on that one.
I’m pretty confused about responding to comments. To start with I thought it was rude if I commented on someone’s blog and didn’t get a response. Then I discovered there are some very friendly bloggers who mostly don’t respond, but will respond if I ask a question. And some do come and visit my blog, and comment there, so there’s still a kind of connection going.
The only ones I give up on are the ones who never respond and also never visit (unless it’s a bigger blog, where it’s par for the course!)
Watching how other bloggers respond to comments has mixed me up a little, because I started to wonder if I was responding too much to comments on my own blog. I see the comments section as a discussion area rather than somewhere for visitors to make isolated remarks, but I’ve been realizing that not everybody thinks of it that way.
As for checking up on replies to comments… do many bloggers subscribe to comments feeds? I’ve been doing that with all my favourite blogs, along with any new ones I happen to comment on (actually it’s scary how few of those blogs respond in any form. If they answered me, I would be more likely to return. What’s even worse is when they’re rabbiting away to regular visitors and ignoring the stranger).
The more difference I perceive in the way others handle their comments, the more I worry over whether or not I’m doing it right, and sometimes I wonder if I’m even welcome reading a blog. I realize that they don’t know who I am yet and it takes time to gain trust, but I need to feel trust too, as a visitor.
Terry Wogan was writing in one of his books about the difference between DJs. There are the ones you can ‘connect’ with as people, and there are the more distant ones who have fans. I think the blog world can be like that.